august-balance
When a composition is balanced, I simply feel it.The painting has a sense of harmony that resonates deep within my core. Often I shed a tear as the final mark is made, knowing somehow it will be the last. The feeling is bittersweet… a savory balance. The word, bittersweet, not only describes my favorite chocolate, it describes my life at the moment.
Feeling a beautiful sense of completion when a painting is finished, I savor its rich presence in front of me. Yet, in the same moment I know another one is waiting to be created. I give a giddy little glance to the next blank canvas as I feel excitement for the next journey of creation. That moment in between paintings is the ultimate balance for me. I am complete, yet motivated. The feeling is important to recognize because it symbolizes how life evolves with every change.
I am quite aware that my life is in evolution lately. Change is the only thing I recognize around me. My surroundings, environment, company, habits, appearance and attitude are strangers to me. Interestingly, my paintings are always strangers, teaching me to accept whatever is created and love what is new. I take this lesson into my everyday life. As I accept my empty nest, new house, new studio, new city, new routine, new people… and my new attitude of acceptance, I smile… and look at the blank canvas waiting. Saying goodbye to one aspect of life has snowballed into just about everything I thought I knew. I am aware that an era of my life is finished. Yet again, a painting is complete. Balance. I can actually see the circle of completion when I close my eyes to savor this moment. I can connect the dots of the choices I have made and see my own evolution circling back on itself to say goodbye. The spiral is growing… growing into its next evolution.
There is a deep well of sadness filled with hidden gratitude in my heart as yet one more change becomes evident in my life today. As a tear rolls down my cheek… to say goodbye to one more comfort, one more thing I thought might stay…and I remember Balance. My composition is increasingly more beautiful with every completion and new beginning.